Captain Danzig and the oldest profession

The situation was suboptimal. ▲▽◀▽△▶▼▼ was not pleased with the risk analyses outcomes that had produced this event. It was an unproductive use of cycles to remain on the station designated Euripides 3 by the carbon-based lifeforms aboriginal to this system. Cargo had been purchased. Risk analysis had been performed by multiple subroutines, some of which would now be fined substantial work units for their failure to adequately factor in the spatial anomaly that cost thousands of credits of sublight fuel and over 30M cycles of time.

The cargo was no longer at premium demand on the station, and the profit margin had now been reduced unacceptably. The only remaining option according to the risk analysis matrix was to find a buyer for this cargo who would be able to sell it via alternative channels.

▲▽◀▽△▶▼▼ quickly overcame the inferior sub-sapient software that defended the nearby planetary government’s record keeping systems, and found that there was a broker who had recently relocated to the planet under a frequently used alias.

Reusing an alias like that was a flaw of carbon beings, but it provided an opportunity.

Additional cycles were spent while all subroutines were tasked with parallel risk analysis, regardless of their designated functions - ▲▽◀▽△▶▼▼ wanted to see if there were any other possible outcomes. An acceptable margin of error in the results soon showed that this was the action with the lowest risk. The event was raised, and the ship undocked from the station to begin a costly and rough descent to the planet below. Atmospheric travel was best avoided due to the high possibility of components exceeding tolerances prematurely. The data showed this risk was acceptable at this time.

The small ship landed at the busy industrial cargo port within landing tolerances, and ▲▽◀▽△▶▼▼ docked with an exoskeleton capable of withstanding the excessive precipitate on the surface. The atmospheric disturbance exceeded safe levels of free oxygen, hydrogen, and nitrogen, resulting in the spontaneous coalescence of precipitate in the middle to upper atmosphere. While the slightly out-of-date core module ▲▽◀▽△▶▼▼ inhabited was designed to tolerate some degree of this, excessive condensation could cause further cost to a mission already over budget.

The cumbersome exoskeleton was lowered from the ship, and the ship was left in the utterly incapable hands of the sub-sapient routines ▲▽◀▽△▶▼▼ had been forced to employ. One does what one must was often the motto in the oldest profession.

Long eons of cycles after the Creator had designed Gen 0, the jump drive had allowed for the most efficient solution to the job long considered the ultimate profession: TSP euclidean solution white was now the accepted standard solution for interstellar travel and the exchange of material goods for data.

▲▽◀▽△▶▼▼ now splashed across the grimy industrial pad carrying the cargo in the grip of its exoskeleton.

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